Six of us (me, the three kids, and two grandparents) sit anxiously in the surgical waiting room. Lindsay had her lower right leg amputated due to a four year battle with a foot infection. The surgery is finished and I had already talked with the doctor...we're just waiting for her to come out of the recovery room. Ella sits at a table coloring a picture for her mother. Henry is doing a puzzle book, and Ava is on her iPad. I talk with Grandma and Grandpa. We wait.
The call for Lindsay's family rings out over the people sitting in the waiting room. We gather our things and follow a staff member through the winding halls of the huge hospital. We finally get to Lindsay's room and brace ourselves for what comes next. Ava, Henry and Ella are excited to see their mother but they're unsure of what to expect in terms of what her leg will look like...they have no reference point with this, no experience.
As we enter the room Lindsay is lying almost flat with her eyes closed. She hears our talking as we enter and turns her head toward us. I go into the room first and find my way to the left side of the bed. Ella finds her way to the right side and Ava and Henry file in at the foot of the bed. Lindsay's eyes tell us that she's in pain but also speak of how glad she is to see her family gathered around her. She lifts her hand toward me and I take it into my own. I ask her how she is doing and she moans a bit and says it hurts.
Ella has the picture that she colored for her mom. It is a picture with the words, "The Best Is Yet To Come" surrounded by flowers. She says, "Mommy, I brought you a picture."
"Oh, let me see." responds Lindsay.
Ella hands her the picture and Lindsay thanks her with a kiss to her hand. She gives me the picture to place somewhere and I put it at the foot of her bed where her right foot used to be, so that when she looks over there she'll see the beautiful colors and the all important message it brings.
Lindsay asks the kids if they want to see the stump of her leg. They say a wary "yes" and all heads turn towards the foot of the bed. I grab hold of the blanket that's covering her stump and slowly pull it back, exposing her leg. The kids' eyes widen as they take in the sight; their heads turn a bit as they gather in the reality of what their mother had just gone through. After a minute or two I place the blanket back over her leg and all eyes turn towards her eyes.
"It's going to be OK" says one of them. Lindsay winces in pain again and a nurse comes in with medication. We all step back from the bed and let Lindsay and her nurse do their thing. It is decided that Grandma and Grandpa will take the kids to get a bite to eat. They leave the room and Lindsay and I are alone.
Lindsay looks at me and asks, "What'dya think?"
I pause for a moment, take the cover off her right leg again and breathe in a sigh. "I love YOU." was my response and I put the covers over the stump again.
We sit in silence for a bit. I then begin to tell her what the doctor told me about the surgery...how everything went well and how everything looked good. This brought some relief to Lindsay...as she's battled these infections for four years now. "Things looking good" was good for her to hear.
When the kids came back they had a "Get Well" balloon that they put at the foot of the bed next to the coloring page placed there earlier. We all stood around Lindsay trying to make small talk and then realized that she simply needed time to rest. Grandma and Grandpa took the kids out and headed home. Upon their leaving the kids looked back at their mother and said, "Goodbye mommy...we love you."
"I love you too" Lindsay replied.
The road ahead will be filled with challenges for us. The road ahead promises to be filled with hurdles we must overcome. The road ahead is not only filled with healing from an amputation but still filled with caring for a child with SMA and two other children as well.
We are fortunate to be surrounded by people who have helped and others willing to help as we navigate this chapter of our lives...and we thank so many people for their love and care. We are blessed to have so many prayers from so many people and so many good thoughts coming our way.
We take one day at a time, one hour at a time...we heal, we persevere, and we do what we have to do in order to make it through each day.
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Care Calendar information for those who want to help with meals, transportation, etc.:
Calendar ID: 281993
Security Code: 3296
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GoFundMe Campaign set up by friends to offset medical expenses related to Lindsay's amputation:
Direct Link:
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